I’m at the bar for karaoke really early tonight. Every single TV in the place is tuned to the NBA All-Star Game. So, some random thoughts as we join the game in progress…
So, this half-time show, eh? They really have their finger on the pulse of popular culture:
- Pitbull, starting with a song that’s what, three years old now? Yep, just checked – “I Know You Want Me” was released on February 24, 2009. Happy belated birthday, really awful song. Does he not have a new album out and, if not, what’s he doing opening the half-time entertainment?
- Chris Brown, who nobody with any taste wants to see anywhere in public, short of his mama and his record company.
- Ne-Yo, who – nah, I’m not going to hate on Ne-Yo, other than to say I could have done without seeing him since it meant I had to see Pitbull again.
How is it that I never watch the NBA, and yet I know that the guy with the horrifying pink tie interviewing LeBron James on the bench is Craig Sager? Damn you, Twitter; I need to learn to pay less attention to stuff that means nothing to me.
Seriously, Pitbull is this generation’s Ja Rule. If there’s a song released in the last three years that doesn’t include Pitbull, I’d like to know about it. I need more non-Pitbull music in my life.
I stopped watching basketball with any frequency in around 1987, back when they stopped worry about travelling being a thing. So, I don’t know if it’s simply an all-star game non-call or normal practice, but I just saw Kobe Bryant take about six steps without the ball going anywhere near the floor. Does he not know how to bounce it? Is he worried about bruising it?
It’s the fourth quarter and Chris Bosh just checked into the game. I’ll confess that I don’t follow the labour situation in the U.S. all that closely. However, I’m just going to assume that there’s a hospitality industry strike in Orlando, and Dwayne Wade and LeBron brought Bosh along to carry their bags and get their drinks. Because otherwise…
Hey, I wonder if Pitbull’s actually allowed to perform here in Ontario? There’s that ban in place, or was he already a pit bull before that came into force?
There’s somebody wearing number O? Seriously? Starved for attention much? And I thought it was bad when Wayne Gretzky chose the absolute highest number possible back in the day.
It’s 151-149 with 16 seconds left. If this finishes in a tie, please, please, PLEASE tell me that they’re not going into overtime. Couldn’t they just settle the game by bringing Chris Brown back out and having the teams throw balls at his crotch in turn – first time that gets him to cry wins?
Wait, LeBron choked with the game on the line? Wow – I didn’t realize the all-star game was one that mattered.
I can’t tell, because karaoke’s starting and they’ve switched the sound off, but do NBA fans boo David Stern the same way that NHL fans boo Gary Bettman every chance they get? Because I think I’d really enjoy that.